The Diva's Holiday: One week in South New Zealand (continued)

23rd July 2006

We were really lucky that the weather had been kind to us during the trip. Sunny days everyday. Perfect for another day of muddy adventures. I dragged myself out of bed really early cos we had a jetboat ride booked in at 11am at Thrillseekers and a quad bike trip at 1pm. Happily, I went for a morning crap, armed with Eddy's PSP. I wonder if the toilet seats had heating, they warmed up real quick. I managed to get the lock stuck in the cubicle somehow. Taking our own sweet time posing for pictures and what with a wrong time zone on Eddy's watch was how we managed to miss our 11am jetboat ride.

These are the evidences that caused us to miss the jetboat at 11am


Due to the life threatening event that took place two days earlier, we decided to book a bus that shuttled people to Hanmer Springs ski field for the next morning. Since Eddy brought along his own snowboard, he didn't have to rent theirs. He was however most tempted to get another stunning deck which he saw in the shop. Somehow, we managed to get to Thrillseekers' headquarters quite early which was a first for us.

From the little expedition yesterday, we realised that the ladies did not get quite so dirty on the quad bikes as we did in the go-kart. A little wet but that was all. But I wasn't going to take the chance. I admantly refused to bathe again in the freezing cold common bathroom, moreover, the mud in my hair took 5 washes to get out! No way I was going to go through that again. Have a look below to see how I solved the problem.

We had to wear that awful overalls again. It was already prepared for Eddy and me. This time we had 5 Saudi Arabian guys join us on the trip with the same guide, Graham, the no nonsense moustachio, who will happily sabotage you if you're too clean. Eddy insisted on the yellow 250cc manual bike (he said that it looked more garang), while I wimply opted for the 200cc automated red one. Anyway, I didn't have much of a choice since one of the guys was intent on getting his hands on the other yellow one as well. Since a couple of them couldn't speak English that well, there was a slight confusion about how to handle it. Much to my chagrin, Graham unceremoniously dumped this hideous purple kiddy bicycle helmet on my head instead of the usual one, cos " you won't be able to see if it falls over your eyes!" It was disgusting! Eddy said I looked like a ninja turtle. I wouldn't give 2 cents to bet that everyone else was snickering behind my back cos I would too. Have a peek at the trip! It was more fun than the go-karts and easy to handle once you get used to it.

Abso-bloody-lutely 183% more fun!

Real crazy pics. Go on, have a good laugh!


Bloody good laugh when I saw this!

Look at this and tell me I don't look stupid...


I hate it when Eddy looks prettier than I do


The cold doesn't hit you till later


Stunning view right?


F**king hilarious that awful purple kid helmet...


I'm chicken, really. To be honest, if I hadn't met my boyfriend, you will never see me doing stuff like these nonsense adventure thingys and I don't like speed that much either, that's why I ride a scooter. Jetboats are so fast! I couldn't breathe... I felt like asking Nigel if he ever thought about making Formula One racing his career. Points to note:

• if you want to keep dry, climb to the front
• wear gloves so that your hands won't freeze till you can't clutch the handle in your excitement
  
• wear a thick jacket cos the WIND!
• keep long hair tied up and covered so that the sad person behind you won't get whipped ten times over
  
• do not sit too close to the driver or he might lose control when you careen into him while he does the 360 degrees turn. I usually end up on the floor

Try and spot me.


Hint: I'm the only idiot leaning to the front

Have you spotted me yet?

Only Smarties have the answer..

After such a fun day, it's almost sinful not to have a huge dinner. We spied a fish and chips shop the day before, but the queue was something else too. So today, we were willing to wait for our dinner at Captain Mike's, cunningly hidden in a corner that we stumbled upon blindly.

Maddeningly, it was closed till 5pm, which was like 45 mins later. We put the kiasu Singaporean trait, that comes ready installed into every Singaporean from birth, and waited right outside the door. You see being in our nature, we wanted to be the first to order. The menu was another thing. They served a wide variety of fried yummies and a resonable price. We ordered the fisherman's basket, corn bites, calamari, mussel pattie and spicy wedges all wrapped in paper. Whoa... the food is to DIE for!

Enormous helpings! I ate till I couldn't squeeze out of the tiny dining space. George Clooney entertained us tonight in Syriana. Or rather, Eddy, I snored my way through the show.

24th July 2006
Yay! I've heard so much about snowboarding from Eddy and I can't wait to make a fool of myself! He owns 2 full decks himself and has travelled to the States, Australia and New Zealand to snowboard. Umm..not to mention Snow City in Singapore too. I'm not a naturally atheletic person and I only ever did sports when I was in school but irregardless of that, I was itching to try my ability at 'ass'boarding... you know I mean.

The bus wasn't a bus, it was a van so cramped with 10 people and equipment that my face was squashed at the window. We passed by that treacherous spot that nearly caused us a heartattack and realised that we were so smart we didn't try to proceed up. The whole journey up took almost a good part of an hour.

We've never seen any pictures of Hanmer Springs Ski Field so the first view of it was a gasping shock! My first thought was, "where are the people"? My second thought was, "how are we going to spend the next 5 hours in this white tiny place before the van comes to take us down again?" I was torn between awe and disappointment. It was fecking devoid of anybody, just plain white landscape with a splattering of 3 main houses. I thought to myself, maybe it was a tad bit too early for the people to arrive, anyway it'll take time to manouver through those countless hair pin turns that made up the scary passage to the ski field. However, the view was totally awesome despite my complains. F**king hell. Way way awesome...

I had to rent the ski field's snowboard boots, deck, binders and an instructor. Sadly, I was told that there weren't any that day. I told Eddy that he was to be my instructor, period.



The view.. man.. spectular


The wind.. man.. can kill you







Seriously boring when you have to wait for the van to come 3 hours later

It was a fabulous flop! I assboarded more than snowboarded. Bloody waste of time and energy for us because Eddy hadn't really got the technique quite right yet so, well,.... we ended up smoking and hanging around the inside cabins. There was one point of excitement when Eddy threw his snowboard hard on the snow and it sped downhill without him! See Eddy run! Ha ha! Poor guy, luckily he managed to capture it before it went right over. We both agreed that we wasted a day at that ski field when we could have made it down to Methven by noon. I'd rather assboard there rather than suffer the boredom here! The strong wind blowing like a tempest made being outside seem like an extreme sport. My face was a rubber mask by evening, the mucus frozen in my nose. It was so boring that I had a good laugh at the people somersaulting down the slopes like acrobats, skis or board flying and legs akimbo, face first. You can do it! In your FACE!

Everyone else seemed to be having a good time, except us. I guess our only good time was the finger pointing and laughing when it hit me that other people sitting inside could see my whole sorry attempt at snowboarding earlier on too!!

I went to NZ with 2 things to conquer, one was to stuff in as many beef pies as possible and the other was to gobble up their famous 'Hokey Pokey' ice cream. I will never forget the first taste of the Hokey Pokey ice cream 15 years ago on a visit to Auckland. It was love at first bite. The Hokey Pokey ice cream is an icon of New Zealand, a simple vanilla flavour with tiny crunchy toffee pieces hidden within like treasures.

And the beef pies are something else too man! Real 100% fresh beef, with pastry flakes that melt in your mouth and the mince just fills your brain, makes me giddy just thinking about it! I had just that beef pie in Hanmer Springs Ski Field. Superb!

By 4pm, we were kowtowing to the shuttlevan. I wanted to hug the driver, I couldn't wait to get down from there! Guess you'll have to be a real skiier or snowboarder to enjoy the place.

Nobody drives at night in New Zealand, it's stupidity. Bedtime there is at 8pm. Being in one of the city that never sleeps and pretty much screw loose, we decided throw all caution to the winds to try and reach Methven by 9pm. We were told it was sucidial but we didn't care, all we wanted was to get to there fast! Afterall, we've already spent 3 nights in beautiful Hanmer Springs. On the way, I noticed that monster trucks didn't just drive past, they flew! They overtook us with breaknecking speed and with the impression of uncontrollable diarrhoea. Back home in Singapore heavy vehicles can't go at more than 60km/h, but here they have their own mind what 60km/h was. More like double that. The journey all and over was pretty uneventful, nothing much to see cos it was so dark. Pretty scary driving on the highway though at night. We took some short cuts recklessly and got lost at Oxford.

Some way along the Inland Scenic Route, Eddy got a 'feeling'. I refused to give in to terror, thinking of Slient Hill. It was so dark and I tried not to look everywhere but front for fear of seeing something I shouldn't be seeing. I've heard stories... Going past Windwhistle the crosswind was so strong f**king freaky! The campervan was swerving left and right and centre like one kind! Shit! Beware of Windwhistle to all who will be driving along there.We reached Methven at 9pm. Not bad for a seriously tired driver and an idiot map reader huh?